Self-reliance is a big and constant thing in my thinking. We need others but we are individuals first. We are interconnected but separate beings still. By mastering the self, we can better help others. The complete rejection of the self is not only impossible; it is also dangerous.
Instead of complete self-reliance or self-forgetfulness, live a life that interplays both. Learn when to rely on yourself and when to rely on others. Find actions that are both self-actualizing and self-transcending.